6 Jan 2017

Nevermind.


He had a volcano inside him, waiting to erupt...his blemishes - the heat waves that escaped. She ran a finger over his blemished skin; it was not unknown territory.
They have both been there before. Sharing a bed, memories; more was unsaid than said. More in-satiation than bliss. He was tired of caring too much for her. She needed him more than she ever had before.
His skin didn't twitch anymore on her touch. He had gotten used to her, a little too much maybe.
She ran a finger on his blemished skin, claiming him almost. If not for real, maybe for that night. Or maybe even for that tiny bit of a second when her finger left a faint impression on his skin. Each impression on his skin turned into a tear in her eyes. She was comforting him, his eyes reluctantly heavy with sleep that had been eluding him; she was in turn comforting herself with those tiny victories.
Time was not to wait anymore. He had moved on, not needing her by his side. Used to the fact that she was going home to someone else. A little too used to maybe. She never had time for him before, now she made that time. But time was not theirs.



Strangely enough, one can fake for a day or two at max. The hurt and insecurities; the aching need to go out and lay claim on that person does not go. Like the sea returns everything you throw in it; the hurt and the pain is returned back with more fervor than ever before.

28 Sep 2016

खोज

गर तुझे ये लगे के तू ज़िंदा है, तो तू है ज़िंदा।
गर ये तेरा सवाल है, तो तू है नही।

मुझसे न पूछ तू तेरी तलाश में कहाँ भटके।
तेरे मंज़िल का रास्ता तेरी परिस्थिति के बाध्य नहीं।

तू ढूँढ उस आवाज़ को, जो कहे तुझे है अब चलना।
इन पहाड़ों में नहीं, तुझे अपने अन्तः मन में है उसे खोजना।

तू निकल अब वहाँ जहाँ जाने की किसी को इजाज़त नहीं।
तू लौट के आ वहां से जिसके बगैर तेरी कोई पहचान नहीं।

24 Sep 2016

...

" keep writing, please?"

" I can't, I need a muse. "

" But you had one, didn't you?"

Well.

27 Aug 2016

your.ghost.



It's the blaze across my night gown
It's the phone's ring
I think last night (you were in my dreams)
You were driving circles around me





So what I do is, turn off the light. Turn the table lamp on, put my headphones on and blast melancholy music, close my eyes and weep; pretend I am on a sea beach, alone in the middle of the night. feeling sand beneath my feet, smelling the misty-salty winds, feeling my misty salty cheeks. I dance a little-like in a trance, realize what i am doing, laugh at my silliness and lay down.

I come back to my senses the morning after.






Crawling back to you

26 Jul 2016

of favourite things

“Be with me always - take any form - drive me mad! only do not leave me in this abyss, where I cannot find you! Oh, God! it is unutterable! I can not live without my life! I can not live without my soul!”


Wuthering Heights. 



22 Jul 2016

a song for my heart.

"What if I fall?"

"Oh my darling...what if you fly!"

-Erin Hanson

pure bliss is when a relationship can be surmised by these two sentences.