i won.

I won’t apologize tonight.

Do I come across as the slut the whore?

Yes I do, I make you walk on that road,

Walk on THAT road, the cemetery of the sins; of guilt.

What hides in there do you notice? What hides in there, do you care?

In there is buried my pride, doused in fire, my identity.

Or is the soil fed the ashes of your ethics?

Do I sound obscene to you tonight?

I do sound distasteful, almost like bad porn.

Do I?

I do, don’t I?

I am no lady with pearls, I am no lady dressed in silk.

I am no lady clad in grace;

Fuck, I am no lady and YOU are no man.

What have you on tonight? What colour are your hands?

Are they crimson again?

Will you colour the sky red again?
Colour it red for it is my colour;

It is my colour yes, colour it red, for it is my blood that drips from your hands.

Wash me with it, for it will wash you off me.

Let me fall silent. For silence is all I have. Silence is where I can hide.

.

There will be the day when I will make peace with peace,
One day there will be no more words, someday I will stash away the swords.

There will be a day when I will stop hoping, stop hoping against hope.

One day this nagging thumping in the chest will cease,

One day I will not miss me, one day I will be complete in my incompleteness.

 Sandpaper my loneliness away.

One day I won’t look for a you in a me.

One day I will stop looking for me.

One day with silence I will elope.

One day, I won’t wake up with a nagging headache.

One day I will sleep.