Why am I denying you?
Every single day I fight with myself.
sometimes to find my love that is there but is in such a tucked away-locked away corner of my heart that I can't find it.
and sometimes all of a sudden. without notice it is right on ky face....and i can't look away. those days i have to fight with myself to not not-deny you.
I know it is stupid. but I know the ramification of it. I know the baggage that comes with it. All the after-effects. I don’t want to be with you and repent.
But there are these blatant moments when I am without you and repent....
…no point…
I guess I should be back to work.

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