dead and alive :)

suddenly, all of a sudden you wake up and realize you are too precious just too precious to run down into oblivion....to get lost.
it has been just a day and i am back. :)
didn't even give people time to realize (assumption is there were people who did keep track of me :P)
maybe it is unwritten garbage that i have added my share to. maybe.
but there are a small set of people who care and people who want me around.
people who do not actually understand my depths but want to see me smile.
people who know me inside out, like an open book and still love me.

like a popular song goes

"...and this life is too short to live it just for you..."

i am living dreams of most women in my family. my cousin who said i was close to living your life...my mom who always wanted her daughter to be like i am...i am living her dream.

i am too full of myself to do that i realized. i have too little time to live pissed off with the world.

too little time to not spend with immediate people around me.

there is too much in formation around me that i have to gather and too many people who need my immediate attention.

it is too short a life to spend hating/disliking/ignoring people.

but please forgive me if i still am indifferent/ a little too full of myself/ a little too selfish for your comfort/ a little too open and make you awkward/ a little too bland, blunt / a little too off the hook for you :P

i apologize if i hate it when you have expectations out of me. chances are i wont live up to them or many a times exceed them.

i still need the pathos for the sheer pleasure of basking into bliss that follows.

i am all this i will be all this. this makes me what i am.

lolz...death in the cyber world is a sure way to have a quick look at what people will do/feel like when you are actually dead. i am just not too sure if i want to find out :)